Not what I expected

Had my ultrasound today. Baby is... TRANSVERSE!!!!

WHAT?!?!?!

Apparently I have WAY more fluid this week than last week, and she's been bobbing around in there, and she turned sideways on me. Of course, she would not stay heads down.

So, after the MF medicine specialist spoke with all of my providers, and it was decided that I would be delivering Meredith via c-section next week, on either Thursday or Friday. The surgical scheduler at the hospital will be calling with the deets on Monday, so I will know more specifics about WHEN exactly we'll be greeting our muffin.

I have to say, I am a bit disappointed. I saw my pregnancy and delivery going in a very different direction. Everything about this pregnancy has been difficult. I was hoping it would be smooth sailing all the way, and I would get to have the natural childbirth I'd been preparing for. Alas, it was not to be. On the other hand, my pregnancy with Emma was perfect, except for the uber shitty outcome.

I guess there is a trade off to be made. Have a crappy not so fun pregnancy and get the favorable outcome, or have a great pregnancy and have a poor outcome. I'll take the latter, thank you, even if it doesn;t conform to my idea of what I wanted this to be.\

Anyway, here's to the certainty of knowing when my baby will be here, and to the fact that she will not have a weird shaped head from being pushed out of my pelvis, and to an extra two weeks of maternity leave!

More to come as we get closer to delivery day!

Any time...

So, the twice weekly stress tests continue, I have had ultrasounds galore (another tomorrow... woot!), I see two doctors a week... I really need this to be over. And I'm only 37 6/7 of the way there.

In case you missed it, baby was Frank breech for a time. She finally decided to turn over (!) so no version for me. I didn't realize how afraid I was until they told me I didn't need one. BOOM, instant relief. Now here's hoping Meredith is still head down, which is what we're checking for tomorrow. So far, she's a healthy, perfect 7.5ish pound baby. I feel like she's going to be a giant, and from all of the pics, she will have totally kissable cheeky cheeks. I really cannot wait to meet my daughter.

This past week has not been without its trials. I have been SUPER moody, nesting like a bad ass, and I had yet another run in with the jerkface OB who is always on call when I feel like something is wrong. After the whole 'I'm bleeding and I might know why but I'm a panicky mom' incident back on like week 15, I had told one of the midwives in my practice that I would have my baby in the parking lot before I would allow that man into my birth room. Her response (and everyone else in the office): Jeff's a really nice man, and he's very caring, but he can sometimes come of as a little abrupt. He is very experienced, and he has beautiful c-section scars. You want him to be there when you have your baby."

Okay, I get it, he gets the gold star seal of approval from everyone in the office. They told me I should have an appointment with him, just so I could actually meet the man. Well, I did. I still don't want him delivering my baby.

I wanted to hammer down a date for my induction, so I could fill out my FMLA paperwork. He looked at me like I was nuts, could not figure out for the life of him why I was asking about an induction, and pretty much said ' well, we won't do it before 39 weeks; we'll give you a chance to go into labor on your own. Let's check with Dr. Johnson (the MF med specialist) and see what he thinks..." 

Um, hi asshat... THIS HAS BEEN DISCUSSED FOR 37 EFFING WEEKS!!!!! READ MY FUCKING CHART, CHUMLY!!!

Ugh.

Anyway, that was a less than stellar meeting. If he's on duty, I will be asking for a resident.

Also disappointing: yesterday I had super intense contractions THE WHOLE RIDE home from the office... 5-6 minutes apart lasting 30+ seconds. FOR AN HOUR. I get home, have a glass of water and lay down. Boom. No more contractions. I was so upset. I really really really really REALLY want to have this baby. Like now. I want her here, in my arms, where I can see her. Sometimes I feel like my body is not the safest place for her, considering what happened with Emma. I will feel much better when Meredith is here with me and Mike.

That and I am very tired of being pregnant. I am way bigger this time, my back is starting to hurt, and this kid seems to think she is Pele because she is kicking my ass round the clock. I can't wait to sleep on my stomach again... 

When I mention how much I want this pregnancy to be done to others, people say that the last two weeks of waiting are the worst, because you are so anxious to hold your baby, but it will be over soon. That's great, if you've only waited 38 weeks for your baby. I've waited almost two years to hold a child. This cannot end soon enough. I have put in my time; is it really too much to ask that she arrive healthy and ahead of schedule?

Okay, enough of my bitching. I will hopefully have a much happier outlook after my appointment tomorrow.

--Shannon